Today is the day I face the music. I'm going to see a cardiologist and I'm not too thrilled about it. I just happened to mention to my regular doctor recently that at times I've had little twinges of pain around my heart and the next thing you know, I was hooked up to an ekg machine. Of course everything was normal as far as my rhythms go, but I'm sure everything won't be normal when it comes to my cholesterol and triglycerides.
The last time I saw a cardiologist was 7 yrs ago. when I was going through all my anxiety stuff. I remember having to walk the treadmill. I thought I would die. And this was after I had lost a bunch of weight. I can't even imagine if he tries to put me on a treadmill in my current state. I won't last a minute. It's downright embarrassing is what it is. I feel so humiliated that I have let myself get to this point.
I guess you could say by going to see the doctor I am being proactive. I do not want to get on cholesterol meds. My husband takes those due to his family history, but I would rather control mine with diet and exercise and organic apple cider vinegar. Yeap, that's right. Good ol' acv. It's amazing the health benefits that can be found in that little tonic. One tsp. per 8 oz. of purified water before every meal and you will not only burn fat, you will do your body a huge favor in terms of health benefits.
If you don't believe me, let me just name a few: "Apple cider vinegar is made from fresh ripe apples that are fermented and undergo a stringent process to create the final product. The vinegar contains a host of vitamins, beta-carotene, pectin and vital minerals such as potassium, sodium, magnesium, calcium, phosphorous, chlorine, sulphur, iron, and fluorine. Pectin in the vinegar is a fiber which helps reduce bad cholesterol and helps in regulating blood pressure."
I dare you to google it for yourself. Perhaps that will make a believer out of you. The key is buying "organic". Braggs is a well-known brand that can be found at any health-food store in America. There are many others as well. With the new year approaching, I have to make some changes. Not just to my diet, but in many other areas as well. I think I will declare 2009 "The year of change" at least in my life. Just sitting around "hoping" things will get better ain't cutting it. In fact, that's the definition of insanity I do believe.
Nope, it's time I pull myself up by the boot-straps and get back in the saddle. I've been wallowing in the muck and mire of self-absorption for far too long. Change is a'comin'. My flesh has ruled me long enough. I know this is not something I can do in my own strength so I am calling on God to empower me to do what I need to do to turn my life around. My relationship with God, my health, my marriage, my relationship with my kids. It all has to change. I will start with God because without Him it's all futile anyway. My daily mantra for '09 will be "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Giddyup, y'all!!!!
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3 comments:
I love your blogs, more so I love your honesty! I didn't have kids for these reasons but ya know what, if I had thought I had nurturing skills, I would have wanted kids.
2 Fridays ago I went in the hosp for a simple 30 mins out-patient surgery. I bled a lot but not as bad as years ago. Honestly, I just didn't want to deal with heavy bleeding and contraceptives anymore. Well, after an hour into the procedure, Dr. Hatcher went in the waiting room to tell Don & Mom it didn't look good then proceeded telling them my uterus was 3x larger size & had tumors. They ended up doing partial hystorectomy. Don said even if I had wanted kids, I probably would not have been able to. I'm now out of work 4 wks and saying if I knew this kind of pain was involved, I'd at least had 1 kid just to get a tax deduction out of it.. haha..
Why am I sharing this? First to say, going to the doc is good but sometimes not good enough. Take the bull by the horns! If I had not pursued a solution to no longer hurt, I'd never had the procedure and who would have known what those tumors could have ended up doing or going?
As far as Mom-hood.. well, you're probably not as bad as your making yourself out to be. If I'm not mistaken, you're a Capricorn. I'm a taurus, we're earth signs. Believe it or not, when I started studying and reading about Taurus and earth signs, I discovered a whole world I never knew I would enjoy. For instance, cooking and rather stay home than go out, plants, outside... I thought I hated home, I really didn't, I just hated the home I had.. once I made it "MY HOME", I became a better person, more stable. Learning and loving to cook and plants, wow.. for once in my life I found a hobby I truly loved.. and was successful at it. In fact, I can plant a small piece of something, root it and watch it grow. I have rescued dying plants.. all kinds of pleasures I found in the simpliest ways.. just learning about ME. I also learned the difference between selfishness and self-preservation. Self-preservation, It's the same concept of putting the oxygen mask on yourself before your family..
Take a moment.. read about the capricorn female.. http://www.icehouse.net/astrolove/capricorn.html
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http://www.iloveindia.com/astrology/sun-signs/capricorn/woman.html
Theresa
Donna, we all have to face this at some point. I have. Let me offer you this one... go to the health food store and get an herbal formal called "Hypertrol" - I took it and it lowered my blood pressure with a few days, until I was able to exercise and do more.
I, too, love your blogs. It's always fun to read the perspective of the witty...
:o)~
Donna, There comes a time when we just get to our breaking point, which is where God finally is able to say " Thank you Donna for getting out of my way and letting Me change you- not you change yourself." I reached that point in my life 4 years ago when God gave me a real wake up call. Dont wait untill He slaps you around some to wake you up! Because you might not like how He does it-- Change comes from a real desire-- If you desire it enough and tell God " I cannot do this alone, Please just meet me halfway" and He will meet you and carry you over the finish line! That is the only way I lost 55 pounds. You can want to in your mind, you can want to in your heart and your Spirit man already wants you to, but when you, all 3 parts of you come together( as God has ordained it from the beginning) miracles happen. This applies to all areas of your life, Marriage, Sex(you dont feel sexy when you are overweight), Family, Children etc... God loves us enough that every little thing he cares about. Even when I cant find the matching earring in my jewlery box, Frustrated I have to stop and I pray " Lord, I know this is a stupid request, but pleeeaasse help me find the other stupid earring in this box! ARRRGGHHH" and He does it everytime becuase He knows it is important to me.
I am not going to give you diet advice, since it was God that showed me the way that works for me. It may not work for others but He prescribed it just for me. And He will do the same for you if you just ask Him and do some research on your own. Fads, Crash and Instant diets dont work for long and they are not good for your system. As Him how to change your thinking. It is a "Battlefield of the Mind" that we live in everyday.
I can relate to your family issues too, I have a 14 year old that cant stand me either!
God Bless You and I will be praying for your strength
God Bless You and your family
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